placing blame where it belongs

after 21 years of living with my parents and 32 years of marriage it has been one year since i have been living alone for the first time in my life...

i thought to chronicle my journey here, but nobody wants to hear wailing and gnashing of teeth - if they did the stories of a glamorous hell would be far more popular than those of a pearly gated heaven...

besides, for the most part you - like 99.9% of all the people in my life - would have believed the life i live to be completely fabricated and/or twisted to make it appear something it is not...

that other 1% - which includes my children - who know me well realize that no matter what or who i am, have been, or am becoming the one thing i am not is a fabricator of lies...

i also did not want to complicate things for my children because they are the very best and most amazing thing that my life has been blessed with and i love them far more than i want to make my story known...

time will open the eyes of everyone else, because lies are lies are lies... and they will always catch up with you. 

for now that 1% who always saw things clearly are finally finding the strength to stand firm, speak out, draw boundary lines that cannot be crossed and placing the blame where it belongs...




and i am finally starting to feel life is changing for the better for myself, my children and my tiny tornadoes whom i love far more than myself....   

12 comments:

  1. Our journeys have been similar, Annie. Years of living with someone who is unable to find the beauty in what they have is demoralizing. My biggest regret is not recognizing what was happening sooner. Wishing you wellness and happiness as you embrace all that is wonderful in your life!

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    1. Thank you Paula. <3
      Surviving is tough but knowing you have inspires me.

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  2. I am glad that life is getting better for you....there is always a rainbow after the storm.

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    1. thank you Kato, i so hope it has wonderful colors!

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  3. You nailed it, m'dear x

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    1. i found my voice.... i need to use it.

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  4. You nailed it, m'dear x

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  5. Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.

    Perhaps you're hearing music again.........

    Love n stuff from a fellow stranger.

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    1. perhaps i am... and as i recall learning to dance becomes easier with time. =)

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  6. I'm glad things are looking up for you. Having integrity and dignity are priceless.

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  7. This sounds like a proud and determined manifesto, a turning point in your journey. Probably neither the first nor the last, but significant nonetheless. And I wish you well. -- Nancy

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