the buff gloved boys

this morning i ran errands.

those errands included stopping at the home improvement store to pick up a few 1x4x8 trim pieces and a piece of plastic tubing along with other odds and sorts.

i was greeted as i entered the store and as i passed each aisle with "Good Morning, may I help you?" to which i responded that i was headed to pick out some lumber for trim....

evidently lumber was not within their jurisdiction.

if you've ever been to the "lumber" store and picked out your own lumber, you know that the first pieces you pull out of the pile are not going to be the ones you take home.  nor are the second. or third.  and so on.  in fact, i think, as a general rule the straightest unmarked pieces of timber are going to be near the bottom of the lot.

so there i am catching splinters in my hands and sawdust in my eyes sorting and stacking and digging and comparing and re-stacking 1x4x8 sticks of lumber in an attempt to locate those timbers that were as close to $4 perfection as i could get.

and there they were; the buff gloved boys...

the buff gloved boys; whose territory i was smack dab in the center of...

the buff gloved boys; who get paid to hoist lumber for tiny blue-eyed batting lash equipped old fart females like me...

the buff gloved boys; who all tried their best to become invisible as they passed me by lest they catch my attention and, god forbid, i ask for help...

this stealth activity continued until finally i had exhausted all the possible timbers - and had placed those that were usable into my cart.

i then engineered the hefty cart over to the plastic pipe aisle and commenced picking a piece of plastic pipe from the shelf.

now, in case you didn't realize, plastic pipe is engineered. it's all the same. so there was no sorting for the best of the best involved here. and i will also mention that it weighs a few ounces at best...

and the reason i mention the weight of plastic pipe is this;

those same buff gloved boys that had passed me by thinking they were wearing Harry Potter's Invisibility Cloak while i sorted through timber up to my knees are now stumbling over each other to help me load 2 ounces of plastic pipe...



  1. Ah yes, these guys work at my home improvement centre, too. Browsing to kill time? "Are you okay there? Can I help you?". When I need help, they evaporate, or work elsewhere, or say they'll fetch the right person who never arrives. Bastards.

  2. The buff gloved boys sound strangely some teenagers I know :)
    Thanks for the chuckle!

  3. I think the buff gloved boys put all the good lumber on the bottom of the heavy pile and then hide and giggle in the next aisle.