wrong shoe drew and the zipper incident

"Ms. Petite, 'wrong shoe Drew' needs your help." said the frantic blonde boy clutching my pantleg. "he's in the boys bathroom."

in the boys bathroom? oooh, those are words that no female in the school system ever wants to hear.

females are not allowed in the boys bathroom for any reason;
there will be no exceptions;
an immediate dismissal will occur;
lawsuits may be forthcoming.

of course all 52 females at AnyWhere Elementary know wasting time trying to locate one of the 3 males in the building could very well bring parental retribution. which will more than likely mean;
an immediate dismissal will occur;
lawsuits may be forthcoming.

already my eyes are scanning the interior of the janitors office which is one door removed from the boys bathroom.

of course, i see nothing but scattered papers and a broom.

"is he hurt?" i ask, hoping this isn't the case while i search further down the hall toward the principles office. with any luck someone will be there i can relay a message to.

this too proves to be a fruitless attempt.

"i don't think so, Ms P, but he's crying and he won't come out of there."

so, as seems always to be the case, the child comes before the job. i cannot leave wrong shoe Drew all alone in the boys bathroom...

i take a deep breath and, hoping its something simple that words from behind a door can cure, i prop the door open a few inches. i tell him i am there and i ask if i can help.

but the poor little one is crying so hard that he can only relay the fact that he can't come out of the bathroom.

and i have no idea why.

i must go in.

with another deep breath i push the door one step further keeping it open with my body. odd reasoning tells me if i keep the door open, whatever it is i am doing inside is visible to the outside thus negating those pesky legal ramifications - like the death of a tutor.

and there in the middle of two tiny urinals three sinks and a stall is Drew, tears streaming down his wet little face.

now, i know my job is on the line but i melt. even though i know it will break the second rule in the code of conduct, i must comfort this child with a hug.

i move inside the bathroom drop onto the floor to meet him at his level. at the same time i cleverly extend one leg hooking my foot around the open door.

through sobs he explains that the teachers have told him he cannot leave the bathroom with his zipper down and he cannot pull it up.

now this is not an easy task for Drew because not only are his fingers ill equipt, but the softness of his tummy folds over the waistband making it more than difficult for him to see what he is doing. [life is not fair, especially to such a wonderful child as this.]

i assure him that i can help and together we'll have him back in the classroom in no time.

a smile lights up his face, his arms wrap around my neck, his nose is dried on my shoulder and a tiny kiss lands on the top of my head.

i grin to myself; all of this for the simple task of zipping a zip? who can resist?

but i was wrong.

the zip tab was stuck under the fabric.

so there am i on the floor of a little boys bathroom, crouched in front of a small boy who is not only wrapped around my neck but is continually kissing the top of my head, fumbling with a zip that is stuck.

and i cannot seem to get the zip unstuck.

i am beginning to wonder whether i should hope i am not seen or hope that i am because i am sure it's going to take pants off and a screw driver to get this zip tab out of the fabric.

this is usually the point where i start to pray. and i must have because suddenly i've almost got it wriggled free...

and Voila!

the zip goes up!

thank god!

but as the jeans are buttoned another little boy steps over my leg and in;

"Hi-ya Ms. Petite! Hi-ya Drew!"
he unzips.
he uses the urinal.
he zips.
"Bye-ya Ms. Petite! Bye-ya Drew!"

and as he steps over my leg and out little Drew who is viewing him with eyes full of wonder says;

Wow! Ms Petite! That guy is so cool! I wish I could do that!

[me too sweetheart. me too.]


  1. Great story! Ms. P. is very brave, and extremely kind.

  2. I love this, Ms. Petite! You're a wonderful teacher!

  3. I thought I'd drop by just to say you get a mention in my latest blog entry, in the CAPTAIN'S BLOG SUPPLEMENTAL.

  4. I hope this is a welcome addition to you trophy cabinet, but I've just given you the Kick Ass Bloggers award at http://idifficult.blogspot.com/2010/02/more-than-you-want-to-know.html

    Um, Congratulations.

  5. So sad that a good person and a great teacher should have to fear the law. Good on you.

  6. "wasting time trying to locate one of the 3 males in the building" this made me chuckle - the truth is always funnier :)

    p.s nice one Teach :)